The Lives We Choose
by whispering willow
Summary: In a world not ready for them, are they ready for each other?  Part one: The Fire Gem of the North : A dangerous Alchemist is playing games with peoples lives. Roy/Ed
1. Forgetful

**The Lives we Choose**

**Part One: The Fire Gem of the North**

**Chapter One: Forgetful**

**Summary: **In a world not ready for them, are they ready for each other?

**Parings**: Roy/Ed

**Warnings/Spoilers**: Spoilers for the end of Brotherhood, though only in some of the small details, as this tends to borrow from both series. This story will contain angst, graphic violence, sex, and death.

You have been warned.

**Notes: **This chapter has only been edited for grammar by a friend of mine who knows nothing of FMA. If you enjoy it and would like to help out, I am in the desperate search for a dedicated beta!

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><p>Bright red lights flashed through the darkness, rebounding from wall to wall, cracking and popping hot in the cold air. The alchemist watched, eyes full of wonder and excitement, as the array came alive, pulling and tearing at the bodies before her. They jumped and convulsed, faces contorted in excruciating agony, and her smile simply grew wider in anticipation.<p>

Color began to fade from their faces as their souls were ripped from their bodies. The bright grey swirls of their very life collided above the center of the room, spinning and sparking out of control, bright in protest. The alchemist spoke quickly, begging the life to enter their new owners, to accept the inevitable change.

The woman's body at her right hand lifted from the ground towards its intended new soul, but as it came closer to the light the body recoiled, resuming its convulsions and falling to the floor. The center of the room exploded in a blaze of red and blue, souls returning hard and fast to their original owners. The force of their rebound knocked both bodies from the array, causing the alchemist to cry out in ferocious anger.

She examined both bodies once the room had once again been flooded in darkness. Cursing and kicking the still breathing test subjects, she dragged them up the stairs. Their souls had been fairly strong to withstand so much.

They would live, for a while longer anyway.

* * *

><p>Warmth flooded the General's office. The air was warm, the floor was warm, and as he sank into it, Ed was grateful the couch was just as warm. Mustang was off in some early morning meeting, and the young man was going to just relax in front of the fire as long as possible while waiting for him. It had been several weeks since they'd spoken, and while he wouldn't admit it even to a fly, Edward missed Roy while he was away.<p>

Fire blazing, the warmth pouring over his bare arms, and couch sucking him deeper and deeper into the cushions, Ed began to drift off. He really couldn't avoid it, he was entirely too comfortable.

Shortly after he had fallen asleep, a quiet click echoed in the large office, and the door swung open. General Roy Mustang slid in and leaned against the heavy wood, shutting it with a deep sigh. These meetings were turning his hair grey, and that was enough to infuriate him, let alone the fact that for every step forward they took they seemed to take three steps back. Things were getting better, but they still had a long way to go. Roy raised his fists to slam down against the door, but slowed them mid swing when he saw a crimson coat lying across the back of his couch. It was his favorite sight to see. This made him smile, and his day was already looking up, despite the heavy guilt poking at the back of his mind.

He walked around to the edge of the couch and sat gently against the arm, watching Ed sleep soundlessly. The light of the flames danced across the young man's tanned flesh, and cast flickering shadows across his face from the mess of hair that fell in front of it. Ed's right hand had, at some point during his slumber, slid beneath his own shirt, resting on his chest and revealing his incredibly well defined abdomen. Roy wanted nothing more at that moment than to lean in, run his fingers up Ed's chest, feeling his skin beneath his hands, and kiss those soft, slightly parted pink lips.

He probably would have been punched in the face.

Roy and Ed had been flirting around in a circle for over three years now. It began the first time they were able to have a conversation where Roy hadn't made any quips about Ed's size, and Ed in turn hadn't cursed the then Brigadier-General down the street and back. As the younger man had walked away that day, he looked over his shoulder with a smile, "Let's do that again sometime Mustang." And they had; the conversations and feelings becoming more and more intimate as time passed. Slowly.

Very slowly.

A smile crept across his face as he watched the sleeping figure stretch and begin to wake. He slid down, picking Ed's sock covered feet up to place across his legs; the automail one incredibly heavy, but bearable. "Good morning Shorty, and happy birthday!"

Ed lifted his foot and slammed his heel into the General's leg. He was kind enough to use the right one at least. "I haven't been short for years, and my birthday was yesterday."

The guilt that had been poking him was now beating him over the head. He tried to gloss over it with a jab at his friend, "I'd hardly call that growth spurt you had 14 months ago 'years'".

"Well it was more than one year ago! So, years, multiple, end of argument."

The blond was refusing to open his eyes and his words were groggy and mumbled. Moving his right leg so that he could wiggle his toes under Roy's warm body, he readjusted, now even more content to remain there as relaxed as possible, for a moment anyway.

His demeanor soured though, and his voice quieted, speaking quite clear and sharply, "I figured you had forgotten when you missed dinner last night." He did open his eyes this time, and they were hurt. He tried to hide it, but Roy had learned long ago how to see through Ed's masks. Not waiting for Roy's perfectly valid excuse of important meetings lasting entirely too long, he quickly jumped up off the couch, tugging his shirt back down, sliding his boots back on, and heading towards the large desk in the middle of the office.

Plopping down on one of the rather ostentatious chairs, he waited in silence for Mustang to join him.

The older man pinched the bridge of his nose in frustration. Officially, and even to each other outwardly, they were nothing more than close friends. Yet they both knew they cared deeply for one another. There was really no way to deny it completely. So many moments had passed where they had come so close, so close to admitting it out loud (they'd long ago admitted to themselves), so close to falling down the rabbit hole together.

No matter how much Ed understood the reasons, or how Roy thought he would be okay after a couple of days, he had hurt him. He hadn't shown up to the big birthday dinner Ed had been looking forward to for almost a year.

_"No one will be able to call me kid anymore! Twenty years old, finally. Thought this day would never come." He had propped his crossed feet on Roy's desk, leaning back with his head leaned back into his hands. _

_Roy had laughed loud and long, "You're only 19 today Fullmetal. Little premature celebration there don't you think?"_

_"Oh come on General! It just means now I get a countdown, a day to look forward to! We'll have a big dinner with all my friends. Maybe I'll even get the old bat, Granny out here for it!" His laughter was interrupted by Mustang leaning close, lowering his voice to a husky tone that Ed hated just as much as he cherished. _

_"You sure you don't want me to take you out, you know, just the two of us?" His voice was like honey on the younger man's skin, and made every inch of his flesh twitch._

_Edward's eyes had opened wide, his breath caught in his throat. He thought for a moment of how much he wanted just that. But he knew better. He knew the two of them were just a half a step away from disaster, from the world falling down around them, the lives they had created being destroyed by a single kiss. __"You'd probably just stand me up." He had grinned his biggest, cheesiest, toothiest grin. "This way, I get to at least be assured that SOMEone will be there to celebrate with me!" When Roy hadn't moved away, his smile disappeared, and the blond brought his hands to the older man's face, running his thumbs across his cheeks. _

_They remained in silence, inches from one another. Their breath made the air between them warm and inviting. Roy was patient, waiting for the younger man to move first, pleading with him to move up and kiss him, to take his lips and claim his mouth as his own. The younger man moved closer, daring to let his lips just brush against Mustang's, before Ed quietly pleaded with the man above him, "Please Roy, don't do this."_

_Mustang had thought for a moment, thought of ignoring him, of closing the millimeter gap and taking what they both so desperately wanted, and needed from one another. But he was right, every time. He'd said it before, and didn't need to this time. If they gave in to one another, they would never be able to hide it from those around them. Their closest friends would understand, but the world around them never would. Most likely, they would lose everything they had worked so hard for, and so would those close to them._

_Sighing and enjoying Edward's touch before standing, he turned away. "One day the world will change Ed."_

_This had made Edward let out a low, soft laugh. "Well, at least I know you never will General Bastard."_

He really hadn't. Deep down, he knew that. Roy reluctantly pushed himself off the couch and headed towards his own seat behind the desk. Ed had propped himself up in his usual position, leaned back in the chair, feet on Roy's mahogany desk. Once, he had knocked Fullmetal's boots back to the ground, and the younger man had retaliated by putting his artificial foot back up on the desk so hard it had cracked the wood. He hadn't bothered removing them since.

They remained there in a heavy silence, Roy still standing in front of his seat, leaning over his desk watching Edward avoid his gaze. "Ed, I'm so sorry. Please…"

"Forget it, General." His curt words and choice of formal address pushed Mustang backwards, falling into his chair. "How did the meeting go anyway?"

Regaining his composure enough to look gruff once again, he became all business. "We finally set a date for the elections." Roy tried to smile as they both settled into their usual, 'ignore the angry/frustrated/disappointed/hurt/sexual tension between them' façade. They were getting used to this routine. "Unfortunately, it's almost two years away, and that means all manner of ridiculous nonsense could happen between now and then." He sighed and let his head fall with a thick thud against his desk. Nothing was going right today.

"Come on now general, you plan on running for Prime Minister I'm sure!" The sarcasm in his voice was not lost on Roy.

"No, Fuehrer may be off the list, but I can still be the commanding general of the Amestrian army. A worthy goal, and still just as achievable. Probably less assassination attempts as well." His words were muffled against the desk, his face squished in an odd shape as he refused to sit up.

"No one would come anywhere near knocking you off with Hawkeye around. Besides, I'd probably try and get to you first at some point." The general looked up at him, trying to figure out if Ed was speaking out of anger or attempting to make a joke. He crossed his fingers it was the latter.

Ed fell silent, trying to figure it out himself. While he was furious at Mustang for doing exactly what he knew he would, he was feeling the pain of his absence the evening before weighing heavier on his shoulders. In order to try and forget it completely, he turned to the purpose he was even here that early in the morning. He had a report to give of his two months spent in Xing.

He started talking, popping the bubble of apprehension floating between them.

Focusing on Edward's recount of his time spent in the East, both men were able to calm down. The elder sat back up, taking in each of his words, repeating them to himself and trying to understand just how they all really fit together. He was trying to listen not only to what was being said, but also, to what Ed wasn't saying, to what hadn't happened that probably should have. This was how Roy's brain worked.

Edward loved watching Roy slip into his tactician mode. With everything he said he watched the cogs turning behind his eyes, plotting, planning. The look on the flame alchemist's face, the fire in his eyes, so sure of himself, so damned cocky… he wished he'd had more to say to draw out more of the passion from Mustang. As he ended the report with boarding the train back to Central however, he was brought back to yesterday, and his anger came creeping back.

Roy had swiveled his chair to the side and leaned back, fingertips pressed together in a steeple just in front of his face, oblivious to the sudden change in the younger man's expression. Although he was now angry again, Ed knew better than to interrupt Roy when he looked like that. He may have been feeling like a betrayed lover, but he wasn't. He wasn't his lover, Roy owed him nothing, and Amestris always came first. Somehow, even though every ounce of logic he had was screaming that he was thinking like a child, this made him feel even angrier. He was jealous of an entire country!

As his fists were clinched, knuckles beginning to turn white, he stood in order to not start lashing out and breaking things. By the time he had reached the door Roy seemed to finally notice. "You haven't been dismissed." His tone was deep and commanding; he actually said it as if Edward would care.

There was a huff of extreme annoyance before he answered, "And when exactly did you think I started giving a shit?" Nearly pulling the door off the hinges, he left the office, slamming the heavy wood behind him hard enough that several frames fell from their homes on the wall.

In the outer office, General Mustang's staff was so accustomed to this behavior between the two of them, that none of them even looked up from their work. "FULLMETAL!" Roy had appeared in his doorway, enraged.

Ed halted at the outer exit, hand on the latch, but he didn't respond, and he didn't look at his superior.

"You will report back here at 1600, ready to leave for your next mission." The slight shake of his subordinate's head told the General he had rolled his eyes. He waited while Ed stood there, undoubtedly trying to decide what smart ass comment to reply back with.

Instead, he simply left, glancing back at Roy for only a moment, fury dancing across his face.

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><p>The thirty minute walk back to his home was more than enough time to let him cool down and let off some steam, ranting at the world and no one in particular. He took the slightly longer route that did not pass by the market, so that he was less likely to be stared at for talking to himself, which he did a lot of when he was angry.<p>

Roy was infuriating. Everything about their relationship, and lack thereof especially, drove Edward crazy. He was his commanding officer, so he was ordered around constantly. Not that he chose to obey those orders most of the time. He was his best and most trusted friend, right after Al. He told Alphonse everything; he wanted to tell Roy everything and more. But that was the problem. He couldn't. Ed trusted Roy with his life. He didn't trust the world. There may have been a general sense of understanding amongst the people about gay men and women, 'leave it at home'. That was the popular phrase. But a gay public figure? Unheard of, and Ed knew it. When he was younger, there had been an occurrence that had been impossible to miss in the news. The extremely popular and wealthy business man that had fallen from grace and lost everything, because someone found out he'd had a boyfriend. It had been an awful fiasco, and still left a nasty taste in Ed's mouth.

Yet, Roy kept trying; constantly touching Edward, making dirty comments, inviting him home, licking his lips in just the right way, looking at him hungrily, having an ass that Ed really couldn't help but stare at, the way he slept that made him want to nuzzle next to him forever, and just how damned fuckable he was no matter what he was doing, wearing, or saying. Ok, so those last few weren't active attempts on Roy's part, but he was still blamed for it.

And to top it all off, the General was _still_ a damned controlling, manipulative, egotistical, self-righteous bastard.

Ed started to let himself get angry again, but was tempered by the smell of Winry's cooking hitting him as he rounded the corner to his street. Stomach rumbling, he ran the last bit, almost sliding on the icy steps up to his front door.

He found in his kitchen, three of his favorite people, two of whom he hadn't expected to see. Winry was leaning over the stove, pouring ladles of something into bowls, Granny and Al sat at the island bar laughing about something.

"I thought you were leaving this morning Granny. And shouldn't you be in class Al?" He tussled his little brothers hair, heading around to where Winry was to see what was for lunch. Before either could answer, she turned around to face Ed, who jumped back and whistled, impressed. "I don't believe it; you look fatter today than you did yesterday!"

She promptly attacked his head with the wooden spoon, but he was still grinning.

"Brother! That's an awful thing to say!" Al hopped off his stool and went to take the weapon from her hand. Once he had removed the bludgeoning object, he kissed her cheek and wrapped his arms around her waist, resting his hands on her protruding belly. "Don't listen to Ed, he's an idiot. You look beautiful."

Their child seemed to agree as they both jumped and started giggling like mad when Winry's belly moved.

Ed, perfectly content to sit and watch them act like complete saps, walked around to steal the seat next to Granny. "Ok, so maybe my choice of words was a little off, but you do look different today."

Al had refused to let go and now had his chin propped on his wife's shoulder, staring down at her belly waiting for it to move again. Winry had to lean her head forward to talk to Ed, "It's just because she's changed positions. I even FEEL bigger today, not that I wanted you to point it out to me or anything jerk." Even though she was trying to scowl at him, concern slowly crossed her face. "Ed, where's your coat? I know you walked back here from the office, you have to be freezing?"

"Huh?" He looked at her and Al, who was now staring at him concerned as well, not entirely sure what she had meant. When he looked down, he realized that he had left his coat in the bastard's office, and had been so angry on the way home that he hadn't even noticed he was walking out in the snow.

Granny only tsk'd, and Ed tried to just shrug it off. "I'm alright, no need to worry! Say, I thought you were headed home this morning, and aren't you usually in class right about now Al?" The others watched him attempt to drop the subject and didn't answer at first, so he asked again. "Someone? Anyone? Tell me what's up?"

Winry broke first, grinning, "Granny decided to just stick around till the baby gets here, rather than travelling home then having to come back in just a couple of weeks." Any talk of their child of course caused Al to continue rubbing her belly. She batted his hand away so she could prepare the bowls of soup and hand them out to each member of her family.

"And you Alphonse, you aren't usually one to play hooky." Ed took the bowl happily, ignoring the spoon entirely and choosing to start by drinking several deep swigs of the savory broth. The warmth of the fresh meal made him realize just how cold he really was, sending a silent curse out to the General.  
>Al was mirroring his brother, not even bothering with a spoon. When he put his bowl back to the counter, he answered, "Had an exam this morning…"<p>

"Aced it of course." Winry interrupted with a proud smile.

Her husband nodded, "I did rather well, but only because I studied my ass off. It wasn't easy. Anyway. Since I had that exam this morning at the University, and I'm guest lecturing at the Academy's battle alchemy class this evening, I asked my afternoon professor if I could have this class off, you know, so I could see my family for the first time in weeks!" Ed knew Al was tired; he was in the Universities Medical program, and taking a double load each term to finish as fast as possible. The military academy was constantly asking both of them to come and talk in their alchemy classes. Ed usually refused, but Al loved the opportunity to share his knowledge with others.

Having the two of them stay with him while Al was finishing school, was not only logical, but made Ed happy. It was nice to have a family to come home to. He didn't look forward to the day when Al became a doctor, and Winry followed him all over helping people just like her parents had done. His home would feel so empty. Ed really didn't need any more thoughts bringing down his mood.

"Well I'm glad you did skip class Al! Otherwise you probably would have missed me entirely. General Bastard has me leaving again this evening." He grumbled the last sentence.

Al and Winry dropped their spoons. "WHAT?"

Granny hmphed, "Dog of the military. Sit, stay, fetch." She finished her lunch and thanked Winry. "I think I'm going to go take a nap for a while." She stopped at the beginning on the stairs and looked back at Ed. "I hated it when you were younger, but I understood your reasoning Ed. Now though, there's no point to it. You made this bed; you have to lie in it." With that she turned and stomped up the steps.

Edward watched her, knowing she was completely right. He was staring at the empty spot where she had stood, reminding him that this was the life he had chosen. Looking back at Al, he shook his head. "What am I doing?" There was a lump in his throat, watching Al and Winry, the only thing that made this building feel remotely like a home, was them. One day they would be off on their own, and Ed would be stuck with an empty house, and no one to share it with.

The morning with Mustang had greatly reinforced that.

Winry decided to let the brothers talk, and excused herself for a nap as well, asking them ever so firmly to do the cleaning up. It was more like a command, but at eight months pregnant, there wasn't anything she said that Al didn't bend over backwards to do for her.

The brothers cleaned up quickly, Edward even helping with the dishes, which he really hated doing. Once the kitchen was clean enough for their standards (Winry would probably have something to say about it later) they retreated to the living room, both men falling exhausted onto either end of Ed's over-sized sofa.

"So," Al looked at his brother, who had pulled his feet up to curl underneath him, his elbow perched on the armrest, and his face buried in his palm. "What excuse did Roy give you?"

Soft, low laughter was the immediate answer, followed with a quiet, "nothing." Ed shook his head, remembering his curt conversations with the General that morning. He hadn't even offered up one single excuse. He tried to say he was sorry once, but when Ed cut him off, he dropped it all together.

"That doesn't sound like him. Roy usually does whatever he can to make it up to you when he does something stupid like that. And he's got plenty of practice making it up to you."

Ed nodded. Despite the public façade, Roy was a deeply emotional man, who did everything he could to take care of those he cared for. When he messed up, he fixed it; never mind the fact that he tended to mess up a lot lately. This time though, he had barely tried. No excuses, only a single attempt at an apology. The last time Roy had to apologize, he actually forced Ed to sit down and listen while he explained his actions. It had been a rather intense situation, and afterwards the young man had had to excuse himself as fast as possible in order to not let Roy see just how turned on he had been.

Though at the time he was pretty sure the General had been worse off.

"It seems like he doesn't care as much as he used to. I was gone for two months, maybe he…" Ed stopped himself and bit his bottom lip. "Al, do you think he met someone else? I mean, I keep sending him away, telling him no. Maybe he found someone who would say yes?" That idea almost brought tears to his eyes. He thought they had agreed that it was better to be friends, not able to be together, but still able to be around each other, that that was much better than never seeing one another again.

Maybe he had changed his mind. Maybe Ed had said, "No," one too many times. Of course, that didn't change Ed's resolve to keep saying no… but…

He threw his hands in the air in defeat and fell to the couch, letting his head rest on his little brother's leg. "I hate this Al; I don't know what to do. I hate not knowing what to do."

The baby brother pulled his older brother's hair out of its tie and ran his fingers through it. "You never were able to figure out how to really deal with other people Ed."

"That's what I have you for though Al. I mess it up and you fix it, say it right, say it better. How many times have you had to apologize for me because I said something with complete and, well, rather brutal honesty?"

Al chuckled. "I can help you with most people, but I can't run interference in your relationships, especially your boyfriend. I can give you advice, but you have to play this on your own."

Anger, frustration, and disappointment mingled in Ed's answer. "He's not my boyfriend Al."

"I know Ed, I'm sorry. Tell you what, when you go get your next assignment this afternoon; don't be an ass. Give him another chance to apologize. If this morning was so out of the ordinary for him, maybe something really odd is up. There are any countless things that could have happened this morning that would put him off his game."

"He doesn't owe me an apology. He doesn't owe me anything Al." He turned his head away, staring out the window at the quiet street. Al didn't answer right away, and Ed let himself settle into the silence.

He had zoned out when Al finally flicked him on the ear, causing him to jolt, spinning around to glare at his little brother. "What the hell?" When he saw the disappointed look on the face staring down at him, he knew exactly which three words were coming next.

"You're an idiot." Al sighed and went back to playing with the long blond hair. "You two may not have a title for each other, but you have something. You've got this weird, complicated, strange relationship with each other. Even if you were just friends, he would owe you an apology for not coming to your birthday. But you're not just friends."

Ed sighed. "When we were younger, and had such a focused goal, nothing mattered but getting our bodies back to normal. There was none of this stupid, relationship stuff. I could deal with the danger and the constant changes, the crazy people were EASY to deal with compared to this!"

This made the younger man chuckle. "Just take a deep breath, brother. Try not to act like _you_ and go all ballistic on him. Give him a chance to apologize. And please, for all of our sanity, reconsider this whole situation." When this got him a confused look he elaborated, "Give it a shot brother. Throw all your misgivings out of the window and try it. Keep it quiet sure, I understand why you're so dead set against it…" he paused and took a deep breath, carefully selecting his words. "Your friends and family will always have a safe place for the two of you."

Slowly sitting up, Ed gave his little brother a soft smile. "Thank you Al. That means a lot to me. It doesn't change anything, but it means a lot." He stretched and moved forward ready to stand, and spoke, not looking back at Al. "It doesn't really matter if we have a safe place though. If anyone besides our friends found out, everything Roy has been working for will fall apart. Not only could he be completely stalled from moving any further in his career, but he's the one spearheading the democracy talks alongside Fuehrer Grunman. They could use me and our relationship against him. Those that want things to keep going as they have been, don't like the change he's bringing about, would happily defame him for being gay, and easily get their way. I can't take that away from him just because of silly little fantasies." Falling silent, he stood and walked towards the stairs, "I'm gonna take a shower before I head back to command."

As he made it to the third and fourth step, he paused when Al spoke up again, voice soft and concerned, "Love is never silly brother."

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><p>General Mustang signed off on one last damned piece of paperwork. His eyes were growing heavy, and he was fairly certain he hadn't actually read what he just signed off on, even though he had been staring at it for the better part of half an hour. Of course, it didn't help that he had been at Command for over 32 hours straight, without sleep. There were only two hours left before Ed would be back, and that was nowhere near enough time to make it home for a decent nap. So couch it was then.<p>

After informing his team that under no circumstances were they to come within two feet of his door, up to and including the apocalypse, he tossed his jacket onto his desk and threw himself onto the couch. He was practically out before his head fell all the way back, but something fell into his face, demanding his attention.

A red wool sleeve brushed against his skin.

He looked at the coat with a sorrowful smile, bringing the fabric down to him and pulling it up to take a deep breath. Edward was all over this coat. Roy felt his lip begin to quiver and tears welled up in his eyes. His chest was heavy, not just from exhaustion, but because he needed Ed and the younger man did nothing but push him away. Heaviness settled over him as he yearned to be held and to hold him in turn, to kiss his skin and protect him from the world. Taking another deep breath he smelled the mixture of Ed's choice of soap and sweat mingled together. Roy's body reacted, muscles twitching under his imagination. He grabbed the coat by the collar and threw the heavy fabric over his own body, pulling it up past his shoulders so as he breathed in the scent, he could pretend it was Edward keeping him warm.

Between the weight of the changes he was bringing to his beloved country, his extreme exhaustion, terrible guilt, and ache for Edward, for the first time since he was a very small child, Roy Mustang cried as he fell fast asleep.


	2. Sleep

**X**

**The Lives we Choose**

**Part One: The Fire Gem of the North**

**Chapter Two: Sleep**

**Summary: **In a world not ready for them, are they ready for each other?

**Parings**: Roy/Ed

**Warnings/Spoilers**: Spoilers for the end of Brotherhood, though only in some of the small details, as this tends to borrow from both series. This story will contain angst, graphic violence, sex, and death.

You have been warned.

**Notes: **Thank you so much for the reviews! Once again, I'm still looking for a dedicated beta if anyone is interested!

The next chapter has been written out, and just needs to be typed up in the computer, as I do all my initial writing with pen and paper. Then of course, it will need a *cough*BETA*Cough*

XD

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><p>Ed grumbled under his breath about Winry being bothersome and calling a car for him. He was perfectly capable of walking in the cold. He'd done it time and time before, thank you very much. Besides, it wasn't like he didn't own another coat.<p>

He had to admit though, he appreciated the gesture, no matter how much he had protested.

The car pulled up to the side entrance of Command and Ed dragged his feet towards the door. He really wasn't looking forward to seeing Mustang again, especially after the morning they'd had. There was no sense of hurry in his movements. Ed trailed his hand along the wall, mindlessly feeling each bump and crevice in the masonry. While shuffling around the corner, he almost ran into a tall, intimidating blonde. He only just managed to step out of the way.

"Good afternoon Edward." He looked up into the unmistakable bright blue eyes of an Armstrong.

"Hey there General! What are you doing way down here out of your mountains? Are you a part of the charter council?"

General Olivier Armstrong nodded her head, the left side of her mouth twitching up in a tiny hint of a smile. "I am indeed, Edward. It hasn't been an easy process, but I feel like we have finally made some key decisions that will speed our progress from now on. I need to wish you a belated happy birthday. I had wanted to stop by your party last night, but unfortunately, council meetings that last almost 24 hours tend to get in the way."

Ed shrugged, nodding in half hearted agreement. He started to inquire as to how her time in Central had been when what she said really clicked in his head. His eyes widened and the color left his face. "Twenty four hours? You guys were in that damned room all day and night?"

The General nodded. "We were indeed. Fuehrer Grumman commandeered the council from General Mustang. He was tired of never receiving an answer and wouldn't let anyone leave until we all agreed on a solution." She saw the look of contemplation that crossed the young man's face and added with a knowing smirk, "General Mustang was rather frustrated by the whole situation. He apparently had intended to have the afternoon to himself. He even tried to escape three times." The disgust in her voice was not lost on Ed.

"What?" Ed looked back up at her in disbelief, even more so when she actually laughed. Olivier Armstrong didn't laugh that often.

"Indeed. The first time was around mid-day. He called for a short recess, but the Fuehrer refused. Mustang took his first opportunity while General Fowler was giving one of his typically long-winded monologues. He actually made it halfway to the train station before the MPs caught up with him, dragging him back to Command."

He was trying to meet Ed at the station? Why would he do that? "Did he say why he was so desperate to leave?" This earned him an odd look from the towering woman, almost as if she had indeed known what Mustangs intentions had been.

"He never said. Refused to tell us what was so important." She paused, gazing at nothing, amused at the memory. "He did however inform us that it was much more interesting than sitting in that stuffy council room staring at all of our ugly faces all day."

A wide, toothy, rather unconvincing grin spread across Edward's face, "I'm sure he didn't mean you General! Heh…"

She peered down at him as he rubbed the back of his neck nervously. "Mmmhmm…"

Olivier continued, "Around 1800 he repeated his actions, practically begging Fuehrer Grumman for a recess, being outright refused once again. Luckily he was quiet about it though, and I'm sure I'm the only one who noticed the disgusting groveling. He was absolute hell to deal with after that. When he stood up to walk out the door at 2300, he was threatened with a court martial. I was certain at that moment he would burn down the building. I knew for a fact it was that anger, that fire, which drove him the rest of the meeting, refusing to deal with anyone who didn't cooperate. General Mustang put the fear of god into several of his fellow officers in the early hours of this morning. If I hadn't already been on his side I may have even been one of them; he was quite intimidating."

Ed was astounded. Coming from General Olivier Armstrong, the Northern wall of Briggs, the ultimate Ice Queen, this was something to be in awe of. It wasn't that she was difficult to intimidate, it was that she couldn't be. Ed was pretty sure this was one of those, ice skating in hell, kind of situations. He was having a hard time finding words.

"Edward, since you are undoubtedly on your way to see General Mustang, please let him know how completely reprehensible I found his actions to be yesterday." Her voice was full of its usual harshness, yet there was a flash of something in her eyes, Ed would almost have called it mischief. "And again, happy birthday." She nodded her head, "until we meet again, Fullmetal," and continued down the hallway.

He watched the tall, commanding general walk away down the hall until she turned a corner, and was trying desperately to reconcile her with the woman he had just spoken to.

* * *

><p>Fuery tried to stop Edward from going anywhere near the General's inner office. "It's not safe Major. He swore to burn anyone alive who disturbed him until he said otherwise." He was answered with a smile.<p>

"I think I'll take that chance. Thanks for the warning though, at least I know to be on my guard."

He shook his head, "Your funeral."

Edward opened the door slowly and slid into the dark office as quietly as possible. When he finally let the door latch with a light click he saw that his suspicions were indeed correct.

Roy was fast asleep on the couch in much the same position Ed had been just that morning. The only thing he wanted to do right at that moment was to pull the General in for a deep kiss.

Mustang was flat on his back, right leg off the couch, arms still clinging to Ed's coat. This made him roll his eyes at first, but as he moved closer and saw that his cheeks were stained with dried tears his expression softened. Now he felt slightly guilty about this morning. He really hadn't given the older man a chance to apologize, and most likely Roy hadn't had the energy to really fight it. Cupping Roy's cheeks and pressing his forehead against the sleeping man's, he whispered, "I'm so sorry." Resisting the urge to finish the apology with a soft kiss, he turned and lowered himself to the floor, leaning against the front of the couch.

The heavy curtains had been pulled, the lights had been turned off and the fire was dying low, leaving only a faint glow to illuminate the pair. Edward stared into the flames, wondering just how many times his short temper had caused situations like their current one. How many times had Ed refused to listen and in turn just gotten angrier? He heard a rustle behind him and turned to watch Roy shift slightly, mouth still open, lightly snoring, still fast asleep.

When he shook his head, smiling, and turned back to the fire, he noticed the small blue box sitting next to the foot of the couch. He paused, cocking his head to the side to stare at the box before reaching for it. The navy blue, velvet cube was wrapped with a narrow white ribbon, tied with a rather crude bow at the top. Ed blinked with confusion. Roy wasn't one for presents unless he wanted something, and even then it was something simple and cliché. Like candy.  
>After several minutes of contemplation, he finally reached for the mysterious package. It was marked with a small tag attached under the crude bow.<p>

'Edward', was written in distinctly Mustang chicken scratch.

He remembered quite clearly that he had told everyone that under no circumstances were they to give him presents. Almost everyone had complied. Winry had gotten together with Gracia to bake the best apple pie he had every put in his mouth, and Al had given him an ancient Xingese book on Alchehestry that he had translated.

He wondered what Roy had gotten for him as he started to slowly tug at the knot.

"I had intended to give you that last night, after stealing you away to myself after dinner." Roy's deep, groggy voice broke through the silence, accompanied by a hand guiding his cheek, slowly moving his head to face the man behind him. "Ed…"

"Don't." He cut the older man off.

"Would you stop interrupting me while I'm trying to apologize?" Roy's voice may have still been slow and tired, but he was as fierce as ever.

Ed gave him a soft laugh and leaned into his touch. "No. I won't. There's no need for an apology. I know you did everything you could. I'm sorry."

"What?" If it weren't for the fact that his body felt like it weighed a ton, he would have been sitting straight up. "Ed, not only do you never apologize, but it was your birthday! What the hell do you have to be sorry for? I'm the one who stood you up!"

"But not on purpose. Besides, you got a lot accomplished yesterday and this morning, and it was… it was…" he paused, the next word feeling odd on his tongue. "It was selfish of me to think I should come before the needs of the country."

Roy blinked, trying to refocus his eyes and make sure he was looking at the man he thought he was. Edward Elric was sitting in front of him, apologizing for being selfish, and he really had no reason to. He was unable to think of anything to say, and simply stared at the younger man in shock.

"No need to look so surprised General." He pulled his head from Roy's hand and turned back towards the fire. "I can admit when I'm wrong just like a big boy."

He received a sigh from behind him. No matter how wrong he was about something, especially when it came to their relationship, Roy knew when it was pointless to argue. He also knew when it wouldn't be very fun to argue, and this was definitely one of those moments. "Just open the damn box, Fullmetal."

With a half hearted scowl he returned his attention to the velvet box. His fingers brushed the grain of the soft fabric before beginning to tug at the bright silk ribbon. It came undone easily enough, and Ed let it slide through the fingers on his right hand, always happy to enjoy feeling things against his skin even after so many years. He didn't immediately open the box though. Whatever was inside would change the game, and he knew that. Roy had never given Ed a gift. Sure he'd done things for him, and bought something that he had mentioned he needed or wanted, but never something like this. Something so un-known and not requested scared Edward so much his hands were shaking.

He heard Roy shift again behind him and then felt a hand lay on his shoulder, just where it met his neck. A soft thumb rubbed his flesh in small, reassuring movements. "Open it, please."

Edward leaned into those words, whispered against his ears. He did as he was asked and the box made a high pitched squeak as the springs protested its opening. Inside he found a long silver chain, with a pendant attached. As he pulled it out of its resting place, the silver glistened in the firelight.

Reflecting the flames as if it was actually on fire, the small silver salamander hung by its tail from the long chain.

"Roy!" Ed gasped his name, frozen in place with the pendant swaying gently in front of him. He watched it, mesmerized. This was more than a game changer; Roy was trying to start a whole new game all together. Ed felt like his heart had stopped, his chest heavy and breath short. Images of what accepting this would mean flooded his mind, making his heart do an about face and begin to pound faster and faster, jumping to his throat.

"I need you Edward."

Visions of flesh and sweat, of hot swollen lips and gentle words of promises to come, of soft touches and passionate kisses passed through Edward's eyes with each glint of fire from the metal as it swung to and fro. He could do nothing but stutter, unable to think of any coherent words to say, "I… I…"

The hand on his shoulder gently tightened its grip. Roy had been guarded for this reaction. He hadn't fooled himself into thinking the young man would accept this offer, but he'd had to make it. He had to let him know he was ready for more, to give Ed everything he had to offer. "I know you're finding the right way to try and shove this back in my hands Ed. Just keep it close, keep it safe. When you're ready, put it on. I'm patient."

Those last two words broke Ed's mesmerized state and he almost fell over laughing. "You! Patient? You have the patience of a puppy." Roy didn't miss the flash of terror on the young man's face as he quietly tucked the gift into his pants pocket before continuing his laughter. "You may be able to wait and act out your complicated military plans over years and years, but outside of this office you can barely stand waiting for your coffee to brew!" Ed had stood up and was headed towards the light switches. He got there faster than Roy could voice a protest and he threw his arms up to shield his eyes.

"What the hell Ed?" The younger mans continued laughter warmed his heart. He hadn't stood up and walked out of the office, he hadn't thrown it back at him, and he hadn't said no. It wasn't a yes, but at this point, a refusal to answer was better than a rejection. Ed was avoiding the situation, but they would undoubtedly find their way back to this conversation again soon. Roy would make sure of it. His spirits lifted, he forced himself up off the couch and went to join a jovial Edward at his desk.

Unlike this morning however, he decided to sit on the heavy wooden surface at the front instead of behind it in his chair. He waited, patiently, for Ed to cease his laughter, watching as it faded to a chuckle and finally a familiar eye roll. "So General, where are you shipping me off to this time? Someplace south, warm, maybe where they have drinks with tiny little umbrellas in them?"

Roy shook his head, smirking. "Bodyguard duty. You're going north."

"You've got to be joking!" Ed jolted, eying the man in front of him. "I'm not a damned babysitter. Find someone else." He crossed his arms and and sat back as he watched Roy pick up the single file that was lying on his desk and start flipping through it.

"I don't know Ed, mysterious disappearances, strange people wandering through the town, unrecognizable alchemical arrays appearing throughout in odd places. Sounds right up your alley. Right up my alley too come to think of it." He rubbed his chin while looking at one of the pages he had picked up. "And I think I need a break from this godforsaken city. Couple of days investigating these reports ought to do the trick!"

Ed shot to his feet, a mixture of anger and excitement fighting in his voice, "What the hell do you think you're getting at. You never leave central anymore. That's the whole point of being a general; you sit back and make others do your work." His hands were shaking, tidal waves of different emotions bowling him over. He was angry that Roy was obviously manipulating things to get a better chance at what he wanted, excited at the chance to be away from Central with Roy, away from prying eyes… just in case he slipped, and gave into his desires. He was also scared shitless that he would indeed give in.

Mustang kept his cool and continued smirking, "Yes, generally. But it also means I get to actually take the cases I want, and no one can argue with me about it. Especially you." Ed didn't know if he wanted to kiss that smug look right off his face, or punch it off. "We leave immediately. General Mustang is going to investigate these reports, and he has ordered The Fullmetal Alchemist to protect him in his travels. Simple as that. We leave at the top of the hour."

* * *

><p>The alchemist circled her array, studying it like she did every day. She would kneel and trace the outline of each shape, each and every line, circle and polygon was exactly where it should be. She knew it was perfect, there was nothing she could have done wrong. It had to be the souls and the bodies. They weren't strong enough, never strong enough.<p>

But she couldn't go on until she knew it would work.

The day had been a long one after the evening she'd had before, another failed attempt. On her way up the stairs she slammed the door above them shut, rattling the walls. Once on the street again she replaced her furious scowl with a warm smile, greeting those she passed with a wave. Studying, watching, she viewed each and every soul in the crowd for its potential, for its raw power.

Nothing, no one would be good enough.

She spotted a young couple in the town center, sitting at the fountain, making a complete spectacle of themselves. A growl escaped her lips as she turned towards them, sitting just beyond the two completely unnoticed. There was really no choice, she would have to try again tonight.

She was getting desperate, and running out of time.

* * *

><p>"Why the hell did I let you talk me into getting on another train the day after I got off one?" Edward squirmed in his seat, scowling at Roy, who in turn shrugged with an exhausted yawn.<p>

"I didn't think you minded, Fullmetal. All those years spent practically living on them with Al, you should have been used to it long ago." He stretched his legs out, propping his feet on the seat next to Ed, settling in lower for a night's sleep.

"That doesn't mean I enjoy it! It was a necessary part of life at the time. I was so focused on our goal I never even thought about how damned uncomfortable they were." He continued his scowl out the window, noticing with a silent curse that the snow was getting thicker and thicker as they went.

"Why do you think I actually bought a place in Central? Not that I ever get to enjoy it! I want to stay put for a while, find a way to… a way to…" His voice trailed off, struggling to find the right words.

Roy looked up to wait for the blond to finish his statement but he was unnervingly quiet, staring at the passing fields of white as they slowly turned grey with the disappearing light, lost in thought. The older man's heart ached for him. For a split second his body reacted, automatically reaching out to him, to comfort him and draw him in close. He was distracted by a loud burst of laughter from the seat behind him and suddenly he was aware once again of just how crowded their car was. Forcing himself back against his seat, he decided that taunting him would be a much faster way of changing the subject.

"A way to be more annoying that's what. Always having to be right underfoot all the time. Still can't figure out why you stayed in the military. Should have left a year and a half ago when you're certification was up for renewal." He tsked and waited for the inevitable.

Ed's head spun so he could glare at the General so fast his thick braid flicked around and smacked him in the face. "You asked me to you self righteous stuck up manipulative bastard!" In his youth his tantrums would have included stomping his feet and attacking the air with his fists, yelling and screaming. As it was, he still had quite the temper, but took it out in single, swift movements against solid objects.

The sudden crack as he threw his left foot forward into the seat in front of him startled Mustang, who quickly clapped his hands and repaired it before he fell through the damaged structure, raw energy sparking in the air around him.

Objects were only solid before Ed got to them anyway.

"I seem to remember you practically begging me to stay! 'Oh please Fullmetal, we need you in the army. You're one of our greatest assets. I need you under my command to look good and have other officers impressed by how amazing my leadership skills are!'" his high pitched mimicking was grating at Mustangs nerves so much he almost missed him add the eyelash batting. "'And so it will be easier for me to kiss everyone's ass the rest of the way to the top!.'" His face was contorted in a look of disgust. He knew full well that his friend only kissed ass in public, and worked his own off getting to where he was.

It didn't stop him from chiding him over it.

Roy was incredibly amused at the way Edward's eyes seemed to glitter as much as Armstrong's when he batted his eyelashes like that. He put on his best scowl, reserved only for Edward, and growled, feigning anger. "I recall it a bit differently Fullmetal. Apparently your memory is about as bad as your ability to maintain a relationship." Ed let out a soft laugh and raised his right eyebrow at those words before immediately putting his angry face back on. "I asked if you were ready to leave us, since your use for the military was all used up. You looked like you wanted to cry, and proclaimed your undying loyalty to me for everything my amazing skills in alchemy, tactics, and commandment could teach you. You wanted to stay and follow in my footsteps. Who could blame you really?"

He was just grasping at straws at this point, and they both knew it.

_Rain had drenched Central for a week. Standing at the gates, his heart as heavy as his rain soaked coat, Ed could barely even see the building beyond the parade grounds. He and Al had been up the entire night before, discussing what he was here to do._

_He still wasn't sure what his final answer was going to be. There had been pros and cons to both answers, and neither one just screamed correct. Once under the cover of the building's outer walkways, he decided to take the long way around, partly to shake off as much excess water as possible, but mostly to shove in those last few moments of solitude to come up with an answer. _

_Stay in the military, or retire and work on his own. _

_Staying in the military meant orders, and the ever present possibility of being told to do something he was against. Money for his research was a plus. One of the bigger plusses of remaining was that he could continue helping people with the military behind him. It could be annoying at times, but having that kind of strength to help clean up your completely justifiable messes came in handy. Al had made that particular case. When they realized how much trouble they could have gotten into, or how much worse their situations could have been, they realized just how much Roy and the military had had to clean up after them._

_Ed of course claimed to be older, wiser, less prone to snap judgements and temper tantrums. "Besides," he had added, "I can't do alchemy anymore, so I don't make nearly as huge a mess of things as I used to!" Al, knowing better, had simply rolled his eyes._

_If he left, he could honestly do whatever he felt like doing. He could travel, though admittedly he really liked the idea of settling down somewhere. He could go and find a wife and even start a family. He had an inward laugh at that one. He hadn't been in a relationship that lasted more than a couple of months, and, if he was honest with himself, he knew exactly why. _

_Ed loved someone else._

_He got to the outer doors of that someone else's office far too quickly for the mood he was in. He felt the doors he was standing in front of loom over him, seeming to grow taller and more intimidating the longer he stood in front of it. It poked at the part of his brain that never backed down from a challenge, that continued fighting at all costs._

_Fullmetal pulled on the lever, and kicked the office door open._

_Fallman jumped from his chair, ready to salute whichever brass was pissed off at Mustang this time. "Oh, its just you Ed."_

_Edward managed a half hearted apologetic grin. "Yeah, sorry about that. Don't know what came over me!" As he was making his apology, the door to the General's inner office flew open, Roy appearing in the space the heavy wood had previously occupied. Ed could see the relief wash over the older man's face when he saw Ed shutting the abused door behind him._

_"Oh, it's just you."_

_The younger man was no longer amused. "What the hell do you guys mean, 'It's JUST you?'"_

_Fallman simply threw his hands in the air in a definite, 'I'm not touching this one' gesture and sat back down at his desk, returning to his paperwork._

_"You're all awfully jumpy. Preparing for an attack or something?"_

_"Or something." Roy gave a half hearted smile and gestured for Ed to join him. _

_Behind the closed doors, Roy watched in silence as Ed shrugged off his rain drenched coat and tossed it over the back of his couch, plopping his body onto the thick cushions. He knew exactly what his choice of seating meant. Official business was always done at the desk._

_"You don't have an answer for me." It was far from a question._

_"Not exactly." Ed didn't offer up any more information until Roy had joined him on the opposite end of the couch, neither man looking at the other. "I stayed up most of the night trying to think of what I should do, the next steps I should take in my life. I know I want to continue my research, and helping people is always a given. I just can't decide which route is the best. Besides, I can't do alchemy anymore, so I can't possibly think of what actual use I would be to the military."_

_Roy shook his head, "You'll always be valuable to the Military. Your knowledge alone is worth them bending the rules for you every other week. But honestly, I don't know if I should be the one offering you advice on this. My answer would be more than a little biased." _

_"Yeah, can't exactly tell one of the military's greatest assets to just walk away!"_

_The man sitting across the couch from him was silent for a moment, seemingly engrossed in the tiny details of the flames before him. Ed moved closer, ready to poke him out of his trance when he spoke. "No. I don't care what the military thinks it needs. I don't want to see you go." Ed sat back in his corner of the couch, a mixture of shock and confusion running through his mind. "If you left the military, I wouldn't be able to protect you." He glanced over at the younger man and raised a hand to halt the forthcoming protest. "And I am well aware of the fact that under no circumstances do you want or need protection."_

_The blond deflated slightly, argument still on the tip of his tongue. He watched as Roy exhaled slowly, turning once again to study the fire. Ed found himself smiling as he watched him become so comfortable again, at home with the flames before him._

_"You don't need protection Ed. But I need to protect you. I need to be able to know that I'm doing everything I can to keep you safe." There were no questions in his words, no pleading. Roy was simply stating a fact that had become an important part of his life._

_Ed didn't pause or falter in his answer, instead, the younger man joined him in studying the flames, "So I'm staying then."_

For a moment they sat in silence, glaring at one another. Ed broke first, a smile slowly spreading across his face while a deep chuckle built. Roy didn't let go until he saw the genuine smile he was looking for; the warm one that went all the way to Ed's beautiful amber eyes. Not until then, did he join him in his laughter. Ed shifted to match Roy's position stretching his legs across from him. Before he settled in for the night, he nudged the General with his foot.

"Bastard."

"Pipsqueak."

"Go to sleep."

"Way ahead of you Ed, way ahead of you."

Both drifted off into sleep, the noises from the other passengers and the train blending seamlessly together into a gentle hum. They hurtled forward as the sun fell below the horizon, and on into the inky blackness of a moonless night.


	3. Falling

**.**

**The Lives we Choose**

**Part One: The Fire Gem of the North**

**Chapter Three: Falling**

**Summary: **In a world not ready for them, are they ready for each other?

**Parings**: Roy/Ed

**Warnings/Spoilers**: Spoilers for the end of Brotherhood, though only in some of the small details, as this tends to borrow from both series. This story will contain angst, graphic violence, sex, and death.

You have been warned.

**AN: **This chapter is a wee bit shorter than the last two because I had to chop it in half. It was originally GIGANTIC before I finally decided to make it into two chapters instead.

* * *

><p>Fire swam through Ed's veins as his flesh was explored by rough and greedy lips. He lifted his hips to press himself closer to the man above him, who responded by moaning as he sank his teeth into the tender lower part of Ed's neck. The younger man gasped as pleasure shot through his body, reaching his hands up to card his fingers through short shaggy black hair. Tugging at the hair in his hands, he dragged Roy up so he could capture his lips with his own.<p>

"Ed! Wake up, you've been asleep all morning and we're pulling into the station." He grumbled incoherently in answer and threw his hand out to attack the offending voice. Roy managed to duck just in time, lowering his body so he was able to whisper in his ear. "I hate to wake you when you look like you were having such a pleasant dream."

Roy's low, dulcet voice did nothing to help Ed come out of his slumber. In fact, he shifted lower in his seat, leaning his head against Roy's chest.  
>"Mmm… but it's gonna be cold out there. I don't like the cold." His words were barely distinguishable through the mumbling, and the man above was fighting the urge to wrap his arms around him and kiss his sleepy blond head when someone behind him took a step backwards and jostled Mustang.<p>

He stood up quickly, adjusting his jacket, "Come on Fullmetal, we've got work to do. He smacked the back of his head with a light flick of the wrist. This earned him a mumbled string of curses as a groggy Ed attempted to get to his feet.

While Mustang laughed behind him, a now mostly awake Edward attempted to get his bearings. The inside of the car was alive with people chattering and moving about, everyone anxious and excited. When he looked out of the window he saw the large platform also packed full of people. The crowd outside was much more subdued however, waiting patiently as the train came to a stop, relaxed smiles on almost everyone's faces. There was something wrong though, somewhere amongst the crowd was a flash of sorrow, but as soon as Ed would catch a glimpse of it, it would disappear just as fast.

The odd feeling was quickly forgotten when he turned back to Roy, who had changed from his uniform to a dark charcoal suit that he looked far too good in, and was too busy eyeing Ed to notice anything out of the ordinary. Ed's automail port and his right knee were sore and cramped from the position he'd been in for several hours coupled with the cold. When he tried to move he tripped with a string of curses. Roy reached out and caught him around the waist, the sudden warmth of his closeness throwing Ed back into his dream.

Legs entwined, bodies pressed together, Roy's mouth was making trails along his collar and neck. "Please…"

Ed shook his head in his best efforts to remove the imagery and put on a brief pout when the older man moved away far too quickly.

"Come on, everyone's getting off."

They followed their fellow passengers in silence through to the exit of the train car. Once they were finally on the platform, the two men stepped to the side in an attempt to be mostly out of the way while still able to take in their surroundings. Ed and Roy watched the flow of people move about the platform in front of them, each man noticing the small details, studying their new environment.

Standing just at the entrance to the train, an elderly woman with a slight hunch and bright white hair that blended in with the starkness of the snow in the background was thanking each person as they passed, shaking hands and smiling warmly.

"If I had known everyone here was going to be dressed so finely, I would have worn my red coat! I thought it was going to make me stand out too much."

"We're here trying to be discrete about our investigation, not letting those that don't need to worry about anything out of the ordinary, which is why I'm out of uniform. Its a good thing you didn't wear your coat, people recognize you almost instantly in that ostentatious thing."

His last statement was answered with a huff.

Roy was first to notice the small child darting in and out of the new arrivals. She couldn't have been much older than ten or eleven, and carried with her a basket full of large, bright red roses.

"How do they grow those up here?" Ed wondered aloud when he spotted her as well. Her long brown hair was braided with an array of small flowers intertwined. As she came closer to them, they were able to finally tell what she was doing with the basket.

Attached to each rose was a bright blue ribbon with a small tag and a key at the other end.

"Talk about service, they don't even have to check in! And look at those passenger vans over there." He nodded to the road beyond the platform. "They're more luxurious than anything I've seen in quite a while." Roy paused and tapped his chin, "Maybe I should ask them who their supplier is for when I'm in control and need new transport."

"Oh get over yourself General." Ed elbowed him in the arm, trying to find where the little girl had gone.

Something cold and empty brushed by Ed's arm and he was suddenly plunged into darkness.

He clutched at his chest, unable to breathe or call out. There was absolute nothingness all about him, no air, no people, no anything.

The complete emptiness of the feeling passed after only a few seconds, and just as quickly as he had entered the crushing void, he was standing on the platform once again.

Roy turned to him when he made a sudden gasp for air. Ignoring his superior's concerned questions he turned towards the train in an attempt to find who had set off the strange reaction. A woman who had just stepped onto the train paused briefly, looked back at Ed with an empty, expressionless face, before disappearing into the car. He started to go after her when the little girl with the roses appeared just in front of him seemingly out of nowhere.

"Name?" The small child looked up at him, eyes wide, patiently waiting for his answer. He considered ignoring her for a moment and going after the woman on the train.

"Elric." He finally answered, curt and still distracted, though he knew the train was almost ready to take off again, and he really didn't want to chance being on it when it did.

The little brunette furrowed her brow and pursed her lips, turning to Roy, who was watching Ed closely. "What about you?" it took him a moment to take his eyes off Edward, crossing his fingers he wasn't going to have to stop him from going back in the damned car. His demeanor softened when he finally answered.

"I'm General Roy Mustang, it's a pleasure to meet you young lady."

Her expression remained firmly in place, "You aren't on the list."

Roy knelt onto one knee so he was eye level with the little girl. "Are you sure? You didn't even check your basket of pretty flowers." He was really laying on the charm.

She wasn't falling for it though. "I know you're not on the list because I have the list memorized." She rolled her eyes and let out a frustrated sigh. "You'll need to talk to Emma. Follow me."

Roy stood, frowning, his ire worsening when he heard the man beside him chuckle. "Precocious little kid isn't she?"

This drew a full bodied laugh in return, "Precocious? Ed, I don't use that word to describe anyone after knowing you as a kid. It just doesn't fit anymore." Ed rolled his eyes in much the same fashion the girl had, causing Roy to just laugh harder as they followed the child through the crowd.

She brought them to a young woman standing near the steps down to the vehicles. Both men stopped their mumbling and laughter when they saw her. There weren't many red heads in Amestris, and they were staring right at a pristine example of one. Her full, curly hair was such a deep shade of red, her pale face and bright green eyes were in stark contrast. She was speaking to a couple at the top of the steps, directing them to the vans below.

"Emma! They aren't on the list!" Much to the little girl's dismay, she was ignored until the couple began descending the stairs. She started tapping her foot rather impatiently. When the redhead answered, it was with a look of disappointment on her face.

"Danni, you have better manners than that! What is wrong with you?"

Roy stepped forward with much more of the usual swagger he approached beautiful women with than Ed could stand to watch. "That would be us. We are apparently not on the list. I apologize for putting her out of sorts."

"Oh," Emma seemed slightly flustered, "Well then." She smiled and turned to Danni. "Go on and get those last few keys to our guests, the trucks are getting ready to leave." Patting the grumbling child's head before she left, she addressed Roy again. "I'm very sorry as well gentlemen, but you're a tad late. Our singles retreat was last month!"

"Singles retreat? Roy, where the hell have you brought me!" Ed leaned towards Roy, his voice low and with more than a hint of danger in it.

He was shrugged off when Roy answered the woman, "We are not here for the single's retreat." There was no hint of anything but business in his voice, so they were both completely unprepared for the reaction they received.

"Oh…." She seemed confused for a split second, then suddenly drew her own snap conclusions. "Oooh!" Her eyes narrowed and her lips turned up in an excited grin. "That's so amazing! We never get couples like you up here! But you're more than welcome!" She paused, then faltered, "Well, if we had any rooms that is." Roy swore she was bouncing slightly.

With a gentle shake of his head and a kind smile, Roy tried to correct her. He had opened his mouth to speak when he was interrupted.

"No no no no no no no no nooooo…" Ed was waving his hands and shaking his head furiously. When he finally stopped flailing about, Roy saw that the color had completely left his face. For a brief moment, he allowed the severe pain in his chest to reflect in his expression.

But he was currently in military mode, and made sure replace the hurt to look as if he hadn't even noticed Ed's reaction. "We are with the military actually. I'm General Roy Mustang, and this is Major Edward Elric. We're here on an official investigation."

Her bright green eyes lost some of their sparkle as she deflated, "Oh, sorry. It's just… well, never mind." The train behind them had started to move once again and Emma glanced at it as it pulled away before turning to the vehicles behind her. "Well I guess we have to find you a place somewhere. We have spare rooms at our home, I'm sure we could put you up in there." She laughed nervously, "There's not even any room in the vans today, so I'll tell you what, you two can ride back with me. I'll just have Danni sit with Leilian in the luggage truck so you can use her horse. Wait here!"

They didn't even have time to answer before she had disappeared down the steps. For a moment they stood in silence, watching Emma, Danni, and the older woman they both assumed to be Leilian, talking by the trucks below.

"What the hell are we doing here Mustang?" Ed wasn't looking at him, but was staring out at the snow-covered horizon. Roy saw the way his hands were curled into a fist, shaking just enough to give away his anger.

For a millisecond Roy considered admitting the truth; that central was too busy, too many reminders of what they shouldn't be. That he wanted desperately to damn the consequences and give them a shot and that this remote investigation would be the perfect chance. He'd already admitted to wanting more; why not find a place to see if it would really work?

Too bad Roy was really far too good at being an ass. "Seeing if you're still able to keep up Fullmetal. You've been on too many research and reconnaissance missions lately, you may have gone soft."

"Soft! Ha! You're one to talk General Desk Job." Somehow, Roy chiding him seemed to cool him off and he visibly relaxed, still staring off into the distance. "You should have seen that Yang Su guy after he tried to attack Ling and I last month! A skilled remote alchemist against two guys with nothing but muscle. I used to think it was my alchemy that gave me the upper hand, but I guess I'm really just that good." The smug look on his face could have rivaled Roy's best one.

Roy shook his head, smiling. "I'm sure Lan Fan had a thing or two to do with your victory."

This made Ed sigh, finally removing his gaze from the horizon to look at his feet. "I didn't tell you this the other day because it didn't concern my actual mission, but she wasn't there. Her family sent her away after they were caught… well, they were caught, together." He looked up then, catching Roy's eye.

They both felt the pain in Ed's voice. "Ling can't become king if he's with a servant of his clan. It isn't allowed."

This caught him off guard. The anger in Roy's voice wasn't lost on the younger man, "That's not right Ed. If he's going to be their ruler and do all the great things he wants to do with his country, he can't…"

Ed cut him off. "It's the way that it is, and we all just have to deal with it. Maybe he can change the laws and then slowly change the way people think when he finally takes the throne, but he's got to make it there first." The way he spoke reminded Roy of himself, years before, when he had to explain how the harsh realities of the world and military really worked to a young hard headed alchemist. "She put up one hell of a fight over it, but in the end, Lan Fan willingly left so the man she loves could become what he needs to be. We all knowingly choose to make those sacrifices."

Roy was certain he was no longer speaking of Xing.

* * *

><p>The self proclaimed Soul alchemist looked up from where she stood, watching the two strange men talk on the platform.<p>

They were different and dangerous. There was a fire and a connection between them that she couldn't quite put her finger on, but she knew that it was exactly what she had been missing.

Not only that, but they had been touched by something with immense power. She could feel it when she passed by them.

They would be perfect.

* * *

><p>Ed had always hated horses.<p>

They were big and smelly and most of the ones he'd known were horribly ill tempered. And these were _huge _horses. Of course, it didn't help that he had never actually tried to ride one before. Roy, who was right at home atop the beast, had originally told Ed to ride with him. That was, until he could barely keep himself up from laughing at how the younger man was reacting.

Now they were heading down a path, bordered in several feet of snow. Ed sat behind Emma constantly grabbing on and letting go in an incredibly awkward state. One moment he was holding her waist, then as soon as his face had become a shade of red to match the woman's hair, he would let go. Shortly after he let go, he would start to lose his balance once again and throw his arms back around her. At one point he nearly fell off after finding a pair of firm breasts in his hands.

Neither Roy nor Emma had been able to hide their laughter at that moment.

"Just hold onto my shoulders if it's making you so uncomfortable Mr. Elric." She finally managed to speak once her laughter had died down.

"I can't seem to keep my balance! I'm always quick to adapt with this stupid leg, but for some reason I just can't adjust. It's the way this stupid horse walks. And please, don't call me mister. Just call me Ed." He grumbled, but managed to place his hands on her shoulders to steady himself, and seemed to be finally calming down.

She let out one last amused chuckle. "Alright, Ed it is then." Looking thoughtful for a moment, she turned to Roy, excited curiosity in her voice. "You mentioned that you were here on an investigation. Is it top secret or something, or could you tell me about it?"

Roy shook his head. "No big secrets, everything we're looking into has been publicly reported at one time or another. Do you pay a lot of attention to what goes on around here?"

"Oh, you could say that. My family, about a dozen of our staff, and maybe twenty or so shopkeepers are the only ones who are always here, throughout the entire year. We notice everything." She winked. "Ask me anything."

"Do you know anything about several unsolved disappearances that are connected with this place?"

"I'm sorry, but we've had everyone accounted for here for years. Well, since Maggie anyway." Roy watched how she spoke, looking straight at him, not even thinking twice about her words or what she was going to say.

He was fairly certain she was speaking truthfully, so far anyway.

"Guests who check in always check out! That's what Danni and Leilian were doing at the train. We don't have a front desk, so Danni memorizes the incoming list and passes out keys, and Leilian retrieves them as they leave."

"What about unexpected guests. What do they do?" Ed had finally seemed to be relaxed enough to think of anything beyond staying upright.

"Oh. Well that doesn't really happen. We book up almost six months in advance."

Roy whistled, impressed, while Ed responded in disbelief. "No way! In a frozen wasteland like this? Who the hell would want to come here?"

Emma laughed again, "Ed, do you even know what 'here' is?" At his silence she continued, "Snow Petal is situated right on top of a vast natural hot spring."

As she spoke, they came to the crest of the hill they had been climbing. Ed and Roy found themselves looking down into a small valley at a tiny village covered in brightly colored flowers. There was a definite center to the town, with a square lined in buildings. Spread out from there however were dozens of tiny cottages, each with their own walled in garden and large spring.

"Where the hell is all the snow?"

She glanced over her shoulder to answer Ed. "I told you, hot spring. It snows just as much as up here on the mountain, but the ground is far too hot for it to ever stick, even in the strongest storm. That means the air temperature stays just high enough so that the flowers don't freeze. Though it does get really miserably humid in the summer."

"If the water in the spring is that hot, wouldn't it boil you alive if you tried to get in it?" Ed looked down at all the little gardens, concern covering his face.

Roy laughed, "I'm sure they aren't directly connected."

"Oh. Oh yeah. My grandparents built this place. They used alchemy to create the individual pools so that the spring only flowed around them. That way they're hot without being dangerous. It did take a few burned toes to figure out the exact thickness of the rock though."

They travelled along the rocky path, the snow on either side of them thinning out as they went. As they descended towards the little village, she told the men more about the history of the resort, and how it had become so popular, filled them in on some of the local shop owners and artisans, and only when prompted, told them about Maggie.

"You mentioned that no one has disappeared that you know of since Maggie. Was that Maggie Barley: her husband, Dennis Barley reported her missing a few years ago, but when it was looked into they just determined that she had left?" Roy didn't have to wait long for her response.

"That's a load of shit!" Behind her, Ed jerked, digging his fingers into her shoulders to keep his balance. "Sorry." She took a deep breath while they both stared at her, waiting for her explanation.

"Maggie didn't leave her family. Danni was only eight when it happened, and she and Dennis had been together since they were kids. The men investigating didn't even pay attention to the fact that none of her personal items were missing."

"Clothes and worldly possessions can be replaced though." Ed spoke from experience, softly behind her, feeling the slight tremor in her shoulders.  
>Even though she couldn't turn completely around, he didn't miss the glare she threw back at him. "She didn't leave. The train only comes through here once a week, and for one, Leilian and I are on that platform every single time it's here, and two, the snow we had that week meant there was no way she was wandering about in the mountains. She could barely find her way around out there on a bright spring day, let alone in a snowstorm." Emma fell silent, suddenly looking down at the ground.<p>

She was quiet for a moment, a sadness settling in around her.

Roy saw it first. There was a flash of white pass over the dark gravel of the road, coming from one snow bank and disappearing into the other. The horses stopped, but didn't react harshly, both Emma and Roy able to hold their reins tight.

Immediately after the small creature had disappeared back into the snow however, something much bigger followed it. A fierce looking wolf darted across their path, growling and barking as it passed. While Roy balanced himself on his frightened animal, he heard a shout beside him.

"NO! Ed don't let go!" Still holding on to his own reins as tightly as possible he turned just in time to see Ed falling from a bucking horse, the fabric of Emma's shirt slipping through his fingers. Roy's stomach churned and his heart stopped when he heard the unmistakable sound of cracking bone as Ed's head hit the ground.


End file.
